I like driving. Road tripping. Seeing the sights while driving a never ending road. I drove some pretty deserted roads while making my way back to Abilene. The place in the middle of nowhere Texas. But usually on longer ish drives I tend to get somewhat emotional, or deep into my thoughts and it takes me a while before I can get out of those pits once I get there. Now, these aren’t unhealthy pits of despair, even though as I’m writing this it totally sounds like it is. But it really isn’t. They’re just moments in which I am able to mull things over and take time to sit and process. It is kind of a trap or some kind of rabbit hole I can fall into. Because then I have to process my processing.
It. Is. Exhausting.
I feel like every time I can also believe in the lie that in order to have rest I just need to wait for the right moment. Which isn’t exactly the right way to do it. I enjoy pressing pause on life or just waiting in life for something to happen. Not necessarily the greatest way. I’m feeling kind of dumb today…here’s why;
“Have you not known? Have you not hear? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”
Isaiah 40:28-31, ESV
We live in an age where anxiety and depression rule our lives. The lives of young people, old people, students, teachers, fast food workers, business men, etc.. These symptoms have become the new “normal.”
That sucks. That is not the way life should be. Darkness has taken these forms and is creeping in without our knowledge.
I have been waiting on life, where instead I should be waiting for the Lord. How can I be so ignorant? How can I do this to myself? Because my old habits are seeking to take their place in my schedule again?
I hate this. I have made the choice in believing such a normalized lie that if I wait on life something spiritual will happen. Nah. The truth is that waiting for the Lord, actively, will restore and fill me up.
I feel like I might write the different variations of the same thing every week.
Well, it’s something that I need to get into my head, writing it publicly with my own hands is helping me understand the directions in which I can call out the lies around me.
Who knew transitions back into American culture would be this complicated?
Pray that the Holy Spirit would envelope me in the best ways. That these lies would fade away with the authority of Jesus. That these lies and idols around me would be broken and destroyed.